... My life experience suggests that being psychologically prepared for physical confrontation in a worst case scenario helps deter such outcomes, but actual training of the sort you have can make you overconfident and a tad too eager to test your skills. Having this attitude will help you decrease your mental and physical toil and will keep your mind active in the act of confrontation. What works well in one circumstance might not fly in another. Confronting someone is more of an art than a science. If you’re leery of expressing your opinion in a direct manner, here are six ways to get over your fear of confrontation: 1. And again to repeat what I left in a different response, this article appeared to me to be superficial click-bait that to me (and I can only assume to may others) trivialized the struggle that we can have with interpersonal confrontations. And to me that feels like trivialization of something I find to be a major challenge in my life. No matter who you have to confront, always remember that no one has the authority to intimidate you or make you feel less worthy of respect. Most importantly, allow your instincts to guide you; if a situation or a person’s behaviour has reached a point where it makes you feel uneasy constantly, then it is time to speak up. Not shocking in the least. Using a known trigger doesn’t fix that. Every time you’re tempted to stay quiet, read over both lists. For some it’s therapy or counseling. We’ve used the “I” to create much safe space in our marriage:). If nothing works - go to a therapist. 3). Whether you are anxious about confronting an annoying colleague who makes inappropriate jokes, or a friend who asks for too many favors, allowing the fear of confrontation to dictate your decisions will have negative consequences on your emotional, physical and mental well-being in the long run. Including ‘Everyone’ doesn’t validate personal belief and they don’t all have your back. Address something minor and you’ll increase your confidence in your ability to be assertive in other situations. Only if you’re the person ignoring this and nobody helps you call. Admittedly, I did deflate my entire argument when I said "shut up." It can also be the result of emotional or even physical abuse at an early age that in which the abuse started with a confrontation. A phobia of confrontation is when someone is excessively afraid of being confronted. The confrontational indivudual is energetically appealing to the person with the higher vibrational scale to help them. Perhaps you go home from work feeling stressed out. Our ability to confront, and more importantly communicate in any situation is determined by a combination of factors, including our personality, upbringing, and emotional intelligence. Amy Morin, LCSW, is a licensed clinical social worker, psychotherapist, and the author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do. If they are openly shouting hostility at you, even if you did not elicit it, they are energetically at a lower vibration of 150 and blocked. A few maybe to begin working with. People who avoid confrontation often make excuses for their behavior, such as “I’m a peacemaker,” or “I don’t want to ruffle any feathers.” Whether it’s an annoying co-worker who leaves coffee cups all over the office or a mother-in-law who makes inappropriate jokes, fear of confrontation often outweighs an individual’s desire to address an issue head-on. Rather it is the ability to engage in conflict at all that is at the core of the problem. While you might want to be more open about how you feel, don’t expect to change overnight. "2. Thank you for sharing your opinion. Many people struggle with conflicting emotions, often putting on an outward smile even though on the inside they are screaming to take action. is if the individual is stuck in a lower vibrational energy. Also, remember that problems and adversities are a part of life. Whether you learned to walk on eggshells because you once had a difficult boss, or your fear of confrontation goes all the way back to childhood, check your assumptions. You won’t change your behavior unless you believe that your current behavior isn’t working. I should probably stop fixating on defending this forgettable comment of mine from nearly a year ago and get on with more important things. Unfortunately, what goes unnoticed about this fear is that if left unchecked over time, it can be crippling. What I write about feelings. It's a free website, nobody owes you anything. Finding your most comfortable zone of expression is key when it comes to fighting your fear of confrontation. When people know my diagnosis of bipolar and anxiety disorders — and given my line of work, most do — they tend to assign all of my actions to said diagnosis. They’re not holding healing energy such as Love. If you have tried and tested methods on how to deal with the fear of confrontation, then share them in the comments below. This is how we shift things. Their energy recognizes that your energy has the tools and the ability to raise their personal energetic vibration and “free” them from one of the beliefs that is blocking their ability to know and feel loved. "3. I don't understand what people like you expect to find on websites like these - the ultimate cure, a panacea for their problems? Why Some Families Laugh Together and Others Fight, How to Get Close to Someone Who Is Emotionally Distant. She made sure she got everything off her chest that she perceived I was doing 'wrong'. practicing is why change doesn’t happen. Soda? Tokophobia: Fear of Pregnancy and Childbirth, How to Advance Your Goals Through Uncertainty and Doubt, Psychology Today © 2020 Sussex Publishers, LLC, How Willpower Wasn't: The Truth About Ego Depletion, Need Motivation to Exercise? use the following search parameters to narrow your results: subreddit:subreddit find submissions in "subreddit" author:username find submissions by "username" site:example.com find … But, as they say, it is never too late to unlearn unhealthy behaviour. The American Psychological Association is quite clear in its assessment of this relationship and points out that stress can not only trigger physical ailment, it can make existing problems worse and lead to chronic illnesses. Thoughts like “Confrontation is bad” or “Telling someone I disagree with them will ruin our relationship” only fuel your fear. generalizing that all, everyone, always have any purpose when trying to validate yourself or a point. Afraid to stick up for herself but sick of feeling like a pushover, Ali Roff decided to find a foolproof plan for dealing with stranger-rage. Often, the real test lies in knowing when to stand up for something and when to let it go. Eg manic, grief. Here are some Ways to Overcome the Anxiety and Fear of Confrontation. "4. Invalidation and intimidation doesn’t make me more right and are classic learned childhood beliefs. The Link Between Happiness and Sexual Intimacy, Find a therapist to combat fear and anxiety, Listen to the Mentally Strong People podcast, 5 Reasons Why Someone Might Be Mentally Stronger Than You, Relationship Killers: Anger and Resentment, How to Be Ultra-Assertive When Your Boundaries Are Attacked, 4 Ways to Be Assertive Without Alienating Others, 7 Ways to Determine Your Partner's Ability to Deceive You. Regarding many topics. Dr Google isn’t a fix unless you’re like me and simply reading different articles on subjects like this one. Could it be that I feel somewhat entitled to find some useful information in an article posted on a website associated with an esteemed magazine such as Psychology Today, and that I was extremely disappointed in what I found instead?